How do you get to that point where you allow someone to get away with abuse by not speaking out?
Why are some employers afraid to take action when you do make a report? Is it that they are also afraid?
How do you get to that place where you don’t even recognize you anymore. Your personality is changing or has changed. You have repressed your emotions because you are trying to be a professional and its not fair to offload at home.
Or, maybe you do offload, but to persons who cannot help. Yet getting off the steam is what is keeping you from losing your mind or committing a crime.
You are frequently depressed, sad –or unhappy. You are stretched to the limit. So stressed at work that you find it difficult to separate work from your personal life , so when you go home you are still thinking about the messed up day you had. You are consumed by the negatives around you. You also become toxic because you were exposed to a toxic environment.
You are asking for help but it is not forth coming. You know the local culture is “informer fi dead” so you are hesitant to make a report. You then think who are you going to report to when the other superiors within the location aren’t any better.
You consider if you will be able to handle the victimization that will happen if you do make an external report. You know you can’t get up and leave or walk away from the job as you have bills to pay, kids to take care of or other family members relying on you. You therefore wait in hope of the right moment to migrate, or await that response from a potential employer. You are exercising hope and faith.
The job takes up most of your time leaving you with limited time to have a successful part-time business. You are trapped. Backed in a corner waiting. For the right time, right opportunity for freedom. You are tired of the arguments so you hold your peace. You are trying to hold on to your dignity that small amount of professionalism that is left within. You have been praying, wishing, avoiding, complying, speaking out but nothing has changed.
You become a walking time bomb.
You have been patient, however that last straw, the comment, gesture, that last order that was given to you MADE YOU SNAP!
You lost it AND No one expected it!
How dare you do it! You responded, you pushed back, you walked out , you broke down, you hurt someone, you hurt yourself, this time you chose fight instead of flight.
The emotions experienced by an employee that has been harassed is indescribable. If you have never experienced harassment it will be hard for you to empathize. You will say she or he should have been stronger, where is the self esteem, why didn’t they nip it in the bud? Do you know if they did. Maybe they did and the situation just continued.
We talk about organizational policies, grievance procedures and open door policies, but do we really adhere to these policies. Do we really have open doors?
How does an employee handle the post investigation or post reporting victimization on the job?
The uncomfortable working environment, the extra work, the malice and hatred experienced because you did something wrong – you reported, you informed!
Who will pat you on the back and say well done you stood up for yourself, we have new found respect for you. Are there still those kind of employees around or do we find “its a man for himself” attitude in the workplace?
I really don’t know what was done to this lady cop, but this evening I heard a clip on Dionne Jackson-Miller’s on RJR 94 @ 5:30pm that shook me up.
It took me to a bad place in time, to the point where I experienced a little (PTSD) post traumatic stress disorder. I had flashbacks, heightened adrenaline, I started to cry in my car because of the audio clip.
I started to re-live my days of being harassed. The days of not knowing where to turn because I worked in a culture that produced, elevated and respected leaders who just “got the job done” it didn’t matter how or who did the job, it didn’t matter the fact that stress was affecting employees health. It didn’t matter how staff or customers were treated what mattered was that some persons had power!
When I got home a friend of mine told me about the same clip, so I watched the video of the cop, customers and superiors at that now famous police station. I wondered why the senior cops in khaki didn’t take their stressed out colleague away from the front office. (Remove her from that negative environment. After all the whole scene was being played out in front of the station) . She was calling names and throwing away stuff including her lunch bag. You could hear it in her voice she had gone past her breaking point but instead of walking away before the emotions kicked in, she got a mental breakdown right there before everyone..
Instead of helping, someone thought of grabbing their cellphone, filming the ordeal and posting it on social media.
OH LORD HELP US PLEASE!
I thought oh my gosh. It was so heartfelt. She kept asking WHY WHY WHY?? WHAT DID I DO TO YOU? I AM NOT GOING TO LEAVE MY JOB… WHY??
A dear friend of mine Nigel, once told me to “never play into the hands of the enemy by letting someone force you to leave your job before the time
“. I have always respected his
advice and I love my friend dearly. I therefore listened and made my moves when offers came my way. However, what if no offers came? Should one remain on the job if it is costing them their health?
This incident also brings to mind the current case of the police federation vs their leaders where a cop will be fined if 6 months notice is not given for their resignation.
Can you imaging being at your breaking point and you are forced to stay in a job that is making you unhappy. The cop pointed out in the video that she was just returning from sick leave when her supervisor decided to “take set on her”.
Just suppose that cop had gone physical on her superior, possibly putting the clients at risk or had become depressed to the point where she committed suicide. I bet you no one would even mention that she was having a hard time at work or that she had filed a complaint. It just seems not matter what the employee gets the wrong end of the stick. (visit loop news if you want to see the story on the incident)
Being an employee is not easy. Work life at times can be overbearing because of the many “Jerk Bosses” that we have to interact with.
However, even if you are a victim now, you can become a victor! You just need to know the type of battle that you are engaging in so that you can be armed and ready.
The Battle Is Not Physical. Its Spiritual and Mental So Fight!
I tell you this, for others out there who have suffered from this weapon used by the enemy, rise up! Bullying is a tactic used by the enemy to affect your mind which is where
the real battle is.
We need to pray for healthy working environments. Mental and emotional stress caused by workplace bullying/harassment ain’t no joke. We have a culture of “thy man for thy self” in Jamaica. We have a culture that says if you are a boss, manager or a “leader” its okay to mistreat people.
Dont fight the battle physically and ruin your reputation, fight it on your knees!
God does not like oppression and he will avenge those who hurt his people. There is a thing called Karma! Rise up people and find your voice.. promote the culture of having a harrassment-free /bully- free workplace. Shun the “Jerk Bosses” instead of rewarding them, teach leaders how to influence and not oppress. Give hope and motivate, pray that the culture that your organization develops is one of positivity.
People live what they learn. Let the upcoming leaders know that bullying is unacceptable in the workplace. Put up an invisible sign “No Jerk Bosses Allowed!” and lets pray for the workers of Jamaica who are suffering in silence.
If you are the one who is at that breaking point because of someone in the workplace just remember God is your vindicator.
Don’t rely on others to fight your battle for you. Go to the General (GOD) and ask him for your weapons to help you win the war! He will give you wisdom and direct your steps if you ask him for help.
Lord we thank you for being our way maker. Thank you for hearing and answering our prayers. We thank you for our leaders and ask you to forgive them as we forgive those who trespass against us. We thank you for being our great Judge and Vindicator. Please help those who are unable to speak up for themselves, those who have lost the will or energy to fight. Free them from the bondage the oppression, depression, the fear, worry and the stress that they experience on the Job as we know these things are not from you.
Free us from mind-binding spirits and from the influence of the enemy. Empower us to be better leaders and role models who encourage healthy working relationships. Transform us through the power of your Word. We give thee thanks AMEN!
BELOW ARE SOME VERSES TO KEEP IN MIND (HELP IS ON THE WAY) Speak them over your life.
No weapon that is formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue that shall rise against you in judgment, you shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their vindication is from Me, says the Lord.
He raises up the poor out of the dust and lifts up the oppressed from the dunghill to make them sit with princes and inherit a throne of glory. “For the pillars of the earth belong to the Lord, and He has set the world upon them.
The Lord also will be a refuge for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble.
who executes justice for the oppressed, who gives food to the hungry. The Lord releases the prisoners
learn to do good; seek justice, relieve the oppressed
Follow the “Jerk Boss” series. How profound it is that the week I chose to write on the topic something happens that is highlighted in the media. The lord works in mysterious ways.
Click on the blue link to read episode 1 of The Jerk Boss..
more to come
Survivor by Glacia Robinson
Its Not Over Now